Planning

what's the most stressful thing you've dealt with with wedding planning so far?

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Wedding addict

Guests dropping out (although it's only been a very small number of guests, phew!) and at the minute 2 out of 4 bridesmaid dresses are still being altered and with the wedding next month I am anxious for the alterations to be completed and the 2 bms to be happy with them!!

New bride

I had a really stressful time with bridesmaid dresses as well! I said to both my bridesmaids that as long as they are purple have whatever style you are most comfortable in as they are physically very different. We couldn't find purple dresses anywhere! I eventually found some in House of Fraser about 2 months before the wedding! 

I have also had quite a stressful time with family politics which I lost a lot of sleep over! More my own doing through worrying about things and whether to invite certain immediate family members but still probably the most difficult bit for me by a mile! 

Bridezilla

Katherine66 wrote (see post):

Talking of stressful today i sat in and waited for my wedding cake stand , one of them anyway, the stupid van driver said he couldnt deliver it so will try again tomorrow, there are 4 people here all waiting for my parcel!!!  Ahhh! 

that's awful customer service, have you put a complaint in? 

Bridezilla

Disenchanted wrote (see post):

Guests dropping out (although it's only been a very small number of guests, phew!) and at the minute 2 out of 4 bridesmaid dresses are still being altered and with the wedding next month I am anxious for the alterations to be completed and the 2 bms to be happy with them!!

Guests dropping out must be annoying with last minute number changes, i hope the alterations work out for you :)

Bridezilla

I think my biggest stress is that Im not getting what I want, a tropical carribbean beach wedding followed by a beach party.

Ive accepted now that that wont happen, but I still get a proper pang whenever somebody else gets married abroad, even if its a european destination. 

Followed closely by the cost of UK weddings and that what you get for the money in my eyes just isnt worth it. I now just ignore the fact that were paying thousands for a nice day. Day! Mainly for other people as well.

I also had a proper panic about the fact that I dont know most of the evening guests, Im pretty antisocial and dont bond with new people, I havent made a new friend in years, everyone is just classed as an acquaintance, a convenient person. I felt like I was going to be an attraction at a zoo or something, loads of strangers having a gawp. But I have my people who I love and always have loved there, h2b loves the rest I guess and Im sure if theyre all telling me Im beautiful Ill soon learn to accept the newcomers 😂

Other than that I wouldny say its a stress exactly but Im fed up of flowers causing trouble.

Bridezilla

MrsJ2017 wrote (see post):

I think my biggest stress is that Im not getting what I want, a tropical carribbean beach wedding followed by a beach party.

Ive accepted now that that wont happen, but I still get a proper pang whenever somebody else gets married abroad, even if its a european destination. 

Followed closely by the cost of UK weddings and that what you get for the money in my eyes just isnt worth it. I now just ignore the fact that were paying thousands for a nice day. Day! Mainly for other people as well.

I also had a proper panic about the fact that I dont know most of the evening guests, Im pretty antisocial and dont bond with new people, I havent made a new friend in years, everyone is just classed as an acquaintance, a convenient person. I felt like I was going to be an attraction at a zoo or something, loads of strangers having a gawp. But I have my people who I love and always have loved there, h2b loves the rest I guess and Im sure if theyre all telling me Im beautiful Ill soon learn to accept the newcomers 😂

Other than that I wouldny say its a stress exactly but Im fed up of flowers causing trouble.

sorry to hear you aren't getting your dream wedding. When initially we were deciding on a budget I was so surprised that people can spend 3/4 times what we had in mind. I'd be so nervous in your situation, i m not that shy but i like to know people, fortunately there's been chances for me to meet nearly all of J's guests at least once except the groomsmen that is. I'm sure the nerves will go away once you're married, that's the important part after all. 

Wedding addict

Wondering if certain loved ones will actually be able to make it due to ill health :(

 

And also reminding people like my partner's dad that the wedding is our day and it's up to us what we do, what we wear, who we invite etc

Bridezilla

FutureMrsWoolgrove wrote (see post):

The guests. A wedding would be so simple without everything related to guests - from trying to chose who to invite (& not invite), to parents having a say on who should be invited, parents randomly inviting people without asking, dietary requirements, seating plans, getting the RSVPs back, sending invitations, etc etc. The guests make planning hard for me - the rest is easy.

This. If you add getting them to book hotel rooms onto that list.

Bridezilla

SoontobeMG wrote (see post):

Wondering if certain loved ones will actually be able to make it due to ill health :(

 

And also reminding people like my partner's dad that the wedding is our day and it's up to us what we do, what we wear, who we invite etc

I hope things out for you with your loved ones health and that your fiances dad gets less stressful. 

Bridezilla

Cake, it shouldn't be that difficult. 3 tiers 6 and 8 inch regular sponge 4 inch gluten free. Well it is if you are getting married in Italy. However my amazing wedding planner has come through for us again and has two bakeries making our one cake 😀 Thiis stress nearly broke me.


Our Planning Thread 

http://www.youandyourwedding.co.uk/forum/your-planning-threads/our-little-big-wedding-june-2017---2nd-time-around/433208.html

 

Bridezilla

Ok some of these put my parcel to shame.  

 

how hard can it be making a gluten free cake?  Im glad you are sorted.  

 

Hotel bookings for guests, i had to book my mums because my stupid step dad cant be bothered!    

Bridezilla

I found it incredibly tough to find my dress! It was definitely the most stressful part. 

Bridezilla

I would say the most stressful things were/are;

In 3rd Place my first caterer, I had to chase them constantly and then they pulled out at least I had plenty of time to find someone else.

2nd Place goes to feeling uncomfortable spending money on myself.

Drumroll please....

1st place goes to guests, not bothering to reply, you chase them, they promise to let you know, still they don't. And the worst guests of all; family, nothing is ever right for them. I've now been prescribed beta blockers for panic attacks. It's all good fun.

Bridezilla

3rd place was caterers. Was let down by first choice early on, then second choice very late on, then third choice were very laid back and didn't respond to emails quickly, or ever get round to giving us a contract! All worked out fine in the end. Managing vendors in general actually was quite stressful, as we got married several hours away from where we live. 

2nd place was managing everyone's expectations and choosing between upsetting them or having what we wanted (or not having what or who we wanted to avoid). Learning to pick my battles basically, what to compromise on and get over and what to stand my ground on. This accounted for 95% of my stress and upset and rants and lack of sleep until... 

1st place was finding out a few days before wedding that my mother and sister plus family were flying from Dublin, not Belfast, and therefore needed passports- not just photo id! 6 emergency fast track appointments later it was all OK! 

Bridezilla

Oh sugarmouse thats awful, ive taken b blockers before for anxiety they work quite well i found.  But yes family guests, ive just had my mums reply back finally, shes decided shes coming!  

Still waiting for all my side and h2bs bm!   

 

Not chasing for another 5 weeks then they get both barrels!!!

Bridezilla

Just been informed my parcel is coming today with the glass cake stand in, i am sitting outside for an hour after lunch!!

Bridezilla

as much as weddings are wonderful I'm so glad we have this board to rant as people don't understand how it can really get a bit much at times. I've had the usual guest issues but on Tuesday the suit company we are using went bust!!! I get married ion 4 weeks!!! Dan Kerr of preston has been going for 100 years and on Tuesday it went under. Thankfully we have wedding insurance - my Mum is super organised but I've spent the last few days trying to soert everything. New appointment at a wonderful wedding shop on Saturday for suit measuring and we will just have suits in time. xx

Bridezilla

The guest list without a doubt. My mum and dad both have 5 sisters and a brother each, all with husbands/wives and I have over 25 cousins on each side. My mum's side of the family get together at least once a week so we're all really close, there is literally no one there I cannot invite. My dad's side of the family I don't see as much, but there would be murder if I invited all of my mum's side and not my dads. And that's without cousins partners, my friends, M's friends and M's family! He's only inviting his dad's side but that's big too! 

This is all because they didn't have telly's in the bedrooms in the 50's...

New bride

sonia9 wrote (see post):

as much as weddings are wonderful I'm so glad we have this board to rant as people don't understand how it can really get a bit much at times. I've had the usual guest issues but on Tuesday the suit company we are using went bust!!! I get married ion 4 weeks!!! Dan Kerr of preston has been going for 100 years and on Tuesday it went under. Thankfully we have wedding insurance - my Mum is super organised but I've spent the last few days trying to soert everything. New appointment at a wonderful wedding shop on Saturday for suit measuring and we will just have suits in time. xx

 

New bride

I know a couple of brides affected by the Dan Kerr closure - so stressful for you.  Hope you get sorted